When I found out I was having a baby, I was elated.  Maxwell wasn’t in my plans, but he was exactly what I needed in my life.  I didn’t know who I was, or what I would ever be without him.  No matter what or who I would ever become it wouldn’t be as fulfilling as when I’m nursing my son, and I see one little eye looking up at me as the other one buried in my once tiny boobs, or when he says mama mam with his little surprisingly raspy voice.  Every time he hits a milestone, my heart could just burst open into a million pieces leaving me vulnerable to the thoughts of my inevitable demise that doesn’t have any power over me anymore because I taught a human to wave, hold himself up, give mommy a kiss.  I am blessed.